HOW TO GET OVER AN EX...By Andy Kwas. BB PIN 2326600E

WHY DO BREAKUP HURT SO MUCH? Falling in love is a chemical reaction. Your brain runs on a cocktail of dopamine, the natural amphetamine PEA, and the bonding hormone oxytocin. Eventually, you develop a tolerance for these chemicals. But when you break up, they surge again. Dissolving feelings for an ex is equivalent to withdrawing from a cocaine addiction. Like any other threat to our well-being, emotional pain fires up adrenaline and cortisol.

The result: nausea, increased blood pressure, loss of appetitie and accelerated heartbeat. Breakups aren't just emotional—they physically hurt.

THE PSYCHOLOGICAL ASPECT: Surviving the fallout of a broken relationship isn't entirely different from being in a car crash or losing a loved one. It often results in post-traumatic stress disorder.

Even your childhood plays a role. Do you know that our attachment to romantic partners is generally a reflection of our attachment, or desired attachment, to our parents. "We tend to transfer the surrogate parental role onto our partners. This makes for relationship enmeshment and a difficult detachment during breakups."

HOW LONG DOES IT TAKE TO MOVE ON AFTER A BREAKUP? Your role in the breakup determines how quickly you move on. Dumpers recover more quickly than dumpees. The length and intensity of a relationship, as well as the identity and support system you had outside the relationship, are other important factors.

WHY CAN'T YOU GET OVER YOUR EXPERIENCE? Yes, it's hard to get over a breakup, but it does happen. And if it's not happening for you, you might be holding yourself back. To get over a breakup, you have to take some personal responsibility, even if you were wronged.

WHAT TO DO: To move on, you need to do everything differently. You can't be the same person you were with your ex. It takes time and effort to stop checking your cell for messages, looking at your ex's Facebook page, or driving by his house." Will Erasing Your Ex's Footprint Mend Your Broken heart? Is there a golden answer for getting over an ex?

Unfortunately, no. I would've told you a long time ago if there were.

In a breakup-related survey i conducted last year, 71 percent of respondents (including those who were married) said they think about their ex too much and 50 percent had called, texted or IMed an ex "when they shouldn't have. But here are teps you can take to heal quickly.

-Break off contact (email, phone, or social networking) with your ex or his family and friends.

-Get rid of (or temporarily store away) items, including pictures, that remind you of your ex.

-Stop having sex with your ex (as if you didn't already know this!).

-Give yourself a "breakover"—i.e. cut your hair, plan a trip, see a therapist, start an exercise routine, take up meditation, date that guy who's not entirely your type—in other words, do whatever you need to feel whole, happy and positive again.

-It's not bad if you give yourself time to grieve after a breakup. Go through the stages of denial, anger, and loss at your own pace. Sweat, talk, and cry the pain out. Don't feel pressured to date immediately, but don't feel discouraged to pursue love again.

-Finally, You need Jesus Christ because he is a specialist in the healing of hearts. Give HIM your heart and ask HIM to heal you now. You may need to ping me if are finding it hard to consult with HIM. I can lead you to him.

-Forgive your Ex and Let go of every form of bitterness. Nothing hinders you like resentment and anger. Forgiveness him or her and lay aside the what they did to you. Forgiveness is 70 percent healing and 30 percent restoration. Don't forget what I just taught you now. Thanks for reading. Tell someone about my Site, this post and be free to share it. Take your time to also read all the other rich articles on my sites. They will help you a lot.

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THE MARRIAGE MAP...By Andy Kwas. BB PIN 2326600E

As a long-time observer of relationships, I can tell you that, like children, marriages go through different developmental stages and predictable crises. But because people are unfamiliar with the normal hills and valleys of marriage, these predictable transitional periods are often misunderstood, causing over-reactions. Those who manage to weather these universal stormy periods usually come out the other side with greater love and commitment to their spouses. That's why I want to offer you a Marriage Map.

STAGE 1 - PASSION PREVAILS

Head over heels in love, you can't believe how lucky you are to have met your lover. Much to your amazement, you have so much in common: you enjoy the same hobbies, music, restaurants and movies. You can finish each other's sentences. When you pick up the phone to call your partner, he or she is already on the line calling you. When little, annoying things pop up, they're dismissed and overlooked.

At no other time in your relationship is your feeling of well being and physical desire for each other as intense as it is during this romantic period. The newness and excitement of the relationship stimulates the production of chemicals in your bodies that increase energy, positive attitudes and heighten sexuality and sensuality. While in this naturally produced state of euphoria, you decide to commit to spending the rest of their lives together. And marry, you do. But soon, your joy gives way to an inevitable earth-shattering awakening; marriage isn't at all what you expected it to be.

STAGE 2 - WHAT WAS I THINKING?

In some ways, stage two is the most difficult because it is here that you experience the biggest fall. After all, how many miles is it from bliss to disillusionment? Millions. For starters, reality sets in. The little things start to bother you. You realize that your spouse has stinky breath in the morning, spends way too long on the toilet, leaves magazines and letters strewn on the kitchen counter, and never wraps food properly before it's put in the refrigerator.

Although you once thought you and your spouse were kindred spirits, you now realize that there are many, many differences between you. You're confused. You argue about everything. When you remind yourself you made a life-long commitment, you start to understand the real meaning of eternity.

Ironically, it is in the midst of feeling at odds with your once kindred spirit that you are faced with making all sorts of life-altering decisions, such as whether and when to have children, where to live, who will support the family, who will handle the bills, how your free time will be spent, how in-laws fit in to your lives, and who will do the cooking. Just at the time when a team spirit would have come in mighty handy, spouses often start to feel like opponents. So they spend the next decade or so trying to get their partners to change, which triggers stage three.

STAGE 3 - EVERYTHING WOULD BE GREAT IF YOU CAN CHANGE.

In this stage of marriage, most people believe that there are two ways of looking at things, your spouse's way and your way, also known as the Right Way. And rather than brainstorm creative solutions, couples often battle tenaciously to get their partners to admit they are wrong. That's because every point of disagreement is an opportunity to define the marriage. Over time, both partners dig in their heels deeper and deeper.

Now is the time when many people face a fork in the marital road. Three choices become apparent. Convinced they've tried everything, some people give up. They tell themselves they've fallen out of love or married the wrong person and they divorce. Other people resign themselves to the status quo and decide to lead separate lives. But there are still others who decide that it's time to begin to investigate healthier and more satisfying ways of interacting. Although the latter option requires a major leap of faith, those who take this leap are the fortunate ones because the best of marriage is yet to come.

STAGE 4 - THAT'S JUST THE WAY S/HE IS

In stage four, we finally come to terms with the fact that we are never going to see eye-to-eye with our partners about everything and we have to figure out what we must do to live more peaceably. We look to others for suggestions; we seek religious counsel, talk to close friends and family, attend marital therapy, read self-help books, or take a relationship seminar. Those of us who are more private look inward and seek solutions there.

We more readily forgive our spouses for their hardheadedness, and recognize that we aren't exactly easy to live with either. When disagreements occur, we make more of an effort to put ourselves in our partner's shoes. We recognize that, as with everything in life, we have to accept the good with the bad. Fights happen less frequently and when they occur, they're not as intense or as emotional as in the earlier years of marriage. And because we're smart enough to have reached this stage, we reap the benefits of the fifth, and final stage.

STAGE 5- TOGETHER AT LAST

It is really a tragedy that half of all couples who wed never get to stage five, when all the pain and hard work of the earlier stages really begins to pay off. Since you are no longer in a struggle to define who you are and what the marriage should be, there is more peace and harmony. You start "liking" your spouse again.

By the time you reach stage five, you have a shared history. And although you'd both agree that marriage hasn't been easy, you feel proud that you've weathered the storms. You appreciate your partner's sense of commitment to making your marriage last. You feel more secure about yourself as a person and you begin to appreciate the differences between you and your spouse. And what you don't appreciate, you find greater acceptance for. If you have children, they're older and more independent, allowing you to focus on your marriage again, like in the old days. And you start having "old day feelings" again. You have come full circle.

I'm certain that if more couples realized that there really is a pot of gold at the end of the rainbow, they'd be more willing to tough it out through the downpour. The problem is, most people fool themselves into thinking that whatever stage they are in at the moment, is where they will be forever. But it's important to remember that nothing lasts forever. There are seasons to everything in life, including marriage. The wiser and more mature you become, the more you realize this. The more you realize this, the more time you and your spouse spend hanging out in stage five. Together again, at last.

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HOW TO TELL IF HE REALLY LOVES YOU....By Andy Kwas. BB PIN 2326600E.

Here is a chance for you to peep into your man’s mind and tell if he really loves you. How will you know if he's made up his mind that you're the one? Let's talk.

1. LISTEN TO HOW HE TALKS ABOUT THE FUTURE. His future once meant he had a date on Saturday night, but with you, he's seeing long-term. When he plans his next vacation, he finds himself making plans with you in them, and when his best friend got married 6 month ago, you were his date.

 2. HE IS MAKING ROOM FOR YOU IN HIS LIFE. Other priorities take a back seat to you, well, because you're more important than them. If he enjoys fitting you into his busy (or not-so-busy) life, that means he values your companionship.

 3. HE IS SOFT WHEN HE COMES TO YOU. See if he is softening up when it comes to you. Instead of insisting on getting his way, he doesn’t mind compromising today. This means he understands the give-and-take of relationships, and feels good about giving a little if it means you're happy or listened to.

4. HIS GIVES YOU HIS SPARE TIME. Note if his spare time is mostly time spent with you. He looks forward to seeing you, and it doesn’t matter what the two of you do as long as he gets to spend time with you. When he's with you, he doesn't need distractions because you're more than distracting just the way you are.

5. OBSERVE WHAT GETS HIS ATTENTION. You're not asking to be the center of his universe — at least not yet! — but you do want to make sure that his priorities have shifted, and that those priorities take you into consideration.

6. IS THERE SPARKS. Note the sparks. You have great chemistry—you can’t be in love with someone without chemistry. Chemistry can be as little as the same tendencies or as big as the same frame of mind. Without planning it, you two tend to mesh.

7. SEE YOURSELF THROUGH HIS EYES. He’s finding out more and more that he likes you just the way you are, and he doesn't stay mad long when you have a disagreement.
He finds your quirks charming—the fact that you snort when you start laughing hard, for example, is unbelievably charming.

8. HE WANTS TO KNOW YOU. Watch to see if he asks questions about you. You can tell that he’s falling in love with you because he wants to find out everything about you. He wants to know where you come from, who your parents are, what you think about and why, and what makes you laugh. He asks these questions like he genuinely cares about the answer, and he remembers your answers, too.

9. YOU ARE ALWAYS ON HIS MIND. Notice whether his thoughts keep coming back to you. He can’t stop thinking about you—he is consumed by thoughts of you. You pop in his head for no reason, and he even wonders if you think of him as much as he does of you.

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IS THERE ONE PERFECT PERSON FOR ME?...By Andy Kwas. BB PIN 2326600E.

QUESTION: Do you think everyone has a “soul mate” out there somewhere, that individual who can complement you and fulfill you like no one else? Is there just one person who is ideally suited for me?

ANSWER: Surprisingly, many singles hold to the notion–either consciously or subconsciously–that there is one perfect, preordained partner. They were made for each other, the thinking goes, and they must simply locate this person or forever feel incomplete.

This thinking is fueled by many Hollywood love stories in which a man and woman are united after a series of near misses and obstacles. At long last, they gaze deeply into each other’s eyes and embrace, usually amidst the swell of violins playing in the background or fireworks exploding overhead. And they know without a doubt that they–the two of them and only the two of them–were meant to be together.

I hear dozens of singles every week complain about how hard it is to find a suitable partner. And if there is just one individual waiting for you out there in the wide world, the search for each other could take a very long time. If, however, there is not a “one and only” partner, a whole range of possibilities opens up. How did I come to conclude that the soul mate scenario is a fallacy? Let me show you from the life of Adam that God gave Adam a wide variety of choices to choose from. You don't agree? Let's talk:

Genesis 2: 18-25
And the Lord God said, It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him an help meet for him. And out of the ground the Lord God formed every beast of the field, and every fowl of the air; and brought them unto Adam to see what he would call them: and whatsoever Adam called every living creature, that was the name thereof. And Adam gave names to all cattle, and to the fowl of the air, and to every beast of the field; but for Adam there was not found an help meet for him. And the Lord God caused a deep sleep to fall upon Adam, and he slept: and he took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh instead thereof; And Adam said, This is now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh: she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man.

NOTE THE FOLLOWING POINTS

1. It is not good for man to be alone. So what did God do?

2. God felt companionship will solve the aloneness problem of Man. There is a difference between being alone and being lonely. When you are alone, what you need is a partner, companionship. But when you are lonely, you are emotionally sick. Adam was not lonely. He was alone.

3. "And out of the ground the Lord God formed every beast of the field, and every fowl of the air; and brought them unto Adam".......

BUT what was God doing?

4. Helping Adam find a life partner and God was giving him many options among "every beast of the field". How did I know? Because the Bible went further to say, "but for Adam there was not found an help meet for him.

Do you know that Adam tried getting along with most of these creatures but could not? The relationship did not work?

5. God saw it wasn't working. That was when he thought of the woman.

6. Meaning, before Adam met eve, he dated the lion, gorillas, elephants etc, but did not succeed. I did not say he slept with them. I said he dated them. To date refers to an activity two people share together with the intention of getting to know each other better on a potentially romantic level. Adam could not relate with these animal at that level. It's funny it's clearly written in the scriptures...."but for Adam there was not found an help meet for him".... This was why I said Adam had many failed relationship before he succeeded with Eve.

7. Do you know that if Adam had approved a gorilla by saying, "this is now the bone of my bone and the flesh of my flesh", God would have said, "Amen" and that would be it?

8. And did you also noticed that God didn't have to go out of the garden to help Adam find his wife? Meaning, whoever can fit into your life as "the one" is someone not far from you.

CONCLUSION: There not one person suited for you as "the one". That is why God did not choose a mate for Adam and he won't for you either. God does not choose a mate for anyone. He only guides if you let him. That why the Bible said,."he that findeth".

If humans can create products and also make spares, do you think God does not do the same with matching? My car have several keys that can move it for example. If that guy walks away or that lady walks away, stop weeping and thinking you have lost the will of God for you. You haven't. There is a "many spare" somewhere waiting to meet you. Come alive and enjoy your life. Someone is waiting just to say to you,."will you marry me?"

Thanks for reading. Let me call everyone for a group discussion not on BlackBerry chat but on facebook. Go to my Fanpage, "De Love Guru Fanpage" on facebook to either ask me your questions or drop a comment on this post. Let's meet and chat there now.

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8 QUALITIES TO LOOK OUT FOR IN A LIFE PARTNER..By Andy Kwas. BB PIN 2326600E.

When looking for a partner, look for both the content and container. Content is character. Container is the physical traits you desire. A relationship can be sustained only if the person you choose has the right qualities and not the right looks alone. Never choose container over content. So, think carefully about what qualities are important to you before you take the plunge but here are 8 very important once to consider.

1. COMPATIBILITY: It is the most crucial aspect in any relationship. You have to connect with your partner. Make sure that the most important choices in your life match with those of your partner. It is important that you understand each other and are physically and emotionally compatible.

2. MUTUAL TRUST AND RESPECT: In order to be able to spend a lifetime together, mutual trust is essential. Respect your partner, and you can expect the same in return. In addition, trust makes you share things openly, so that prevents issues from building up in your relationship.

3. SENSE OF HUMOR: With my experience, I have seen that this quality is very important in a relationship. When the going gets tough in life, a good sense of humor takes you through rough situations smoothly. It also helps to be around a fun, cheerful person.

4. MATURITY: A very difficult quality to judge, but it can take you very far especially when you have conflicts. It takes a mature person to handle the tough, complicated issues that you are bound to face in your life together.

5. SIMILAR POINT OF VIEW: People say that opposites attract, but it is also true that likes sustain. Once you have a family and have many roles to juggle, it helps to share similar views. It is more practical and lets you connect well with each other. Similar views right from career, children, finances and others help make things easier in life.

6. PHYSICAL COMPATIBILITY: This is a very important quality for couples to possess. You must be sexually attracted to your partner. Couples who are physically incompatible can have a tumultuous relationship despite getting all other factors right.

7. HONESTY AND TRUTHFULNESS: It is important to be honest, fair, and truthful in your interaction with each other. The foundation of any relationship is based on your ability to both crucial qualities, and if your partner lacks them then it is difficult to sustain the relationship.

8. THE FEAR OF GOD: The fear of God is the greatest restraining force I know. When a man truly fears God, there are many things he cannot do. It's like a strong chain on the neck of a wild and violent dog. Don’t marry a partner who does not fear God.

I believe that, if you are able to find these good qualities in your partner, then you are in good hands for a lifetime. Of course, each relationship is different; we do not know how things will play out in the future. This is as far as we can go in ensuring a loving, compatible relationship among life partners. Do fine-tune these qualities according to your own needs. Make sure your decision is very careful before you plunge into a lifelong commitment.

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6 THINGS YOU NEVER KNEW ABOUT SEX...by Andy Kwas. BB PIN 2326600E

Just as every authentic product manufactured by someone comes with a manual, so also is sex. This product called “sex” also has a manual and God is the manufacturer. To operate a device against the manufacturer's prescription is called product abuse, meaning "abnormal use". Here are 6 things you never knew about sex.

#1. SEX IS NOT JUST AN ACT. IT’S A COVENANT THAT BINDS ON THE 2 PARTNERS. When you sleep with someone, you enter into a covenant with the person. Let me explain. Have you noticed why the virginal of a woman is sealed with a thin blood membrane called, “THE HYMEN” if she’s a virgin?  When she has sex with a man for the first time, the hymen is torn and blood from the torn hymen is poured out to seal the union.  This is an indication that a blood covenant has just been cut between the 2 partners. In the case of non virgins,  the sperms and semen is what seals the union.

#2: SEX IS A HOOKER: If sex is cutting covenant with someone, then it’s not something you do and just walk away from. It’s something you do and after which you get hooked.  Sex is a hooker. It hooks you to your partner’s past, present and future until it is broken. I have seen people become gays, lesbians, develop unusual hunger for sex and bind themselves with so many complicated problems after having sex with a sexually perverted partner.

#3. IN MARRIAGE, YOU MAKE LOVE BUT OUTSIDE MARRIAGE YOU UNMAKE IT. See why. The deepest way to know a person physically is to sleep with the person. It’s the height of  physical intimacy. There is nothing deeper.  In marriage, this is beautiful. But outside marriage, this singular act can destroy a relationship.  It’s brings the 2 partners to a place where they have nothing new to explore in their relationship since they have come to the end of the tunnel where there is nothing PHYSICALLY new to explore. If all they have built was sexual intimacy and have no other forms of  knowledge about each other like intellectual intimacy, Social intimacy or spiritual intimacy, the relationship will die a natural death. It will not last.

#4: SEX IS A GATE: When you have sex, you create a gate or a rout of passage where internal content in the PARTNERS are freely exchanged.  A gate is a point of passage. All the YOU are (physically, emotional and spiritually) is passed into your partner and all of theirs is freely passed into you via sex. This is why i said, “ANYONE YOU SLEEP WITH, YOU RISE WITH”. Why? Because All the content of a person is exchange during sex. The painful thing is this. If you sleep with a partner with content’s such as madness, epilepsy, gay, lesbianism, etc, you leave sharing all these. Beware of who you sleep with.

5. SEX IS A RELEASE: You don’t just release sperm or semen during sex. You release a mixture of your past, present and future and vice versa into your partner. You don’t just release physical content. You also release spiritual content which when analyzed will scare the living day light out of you.

6. SEX IS NOT LOVE AND LOVE IS NOT SEX: If a partner tells you that sex is his/her only way to express how much he/she loves you, then they just lied to you. Sex is not love and Love is not sex. Love and sex are apart as day and night. They are not close or related in any way. Thanks for reading.

My name is Andy Kwas & I enjoy helping people release the inner sparkles in their love and relationship life. Why not Join me on this mission by sharing this post and my BB PIN 2326600E with at least 10 friends today.

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THE 14 TEST OF GENUINE LOVE...by Andy Kwas. BB PIN 2326600E

Love is not a feeling. Love is not sex. Love is not goose bumps. Love is not instant likeness. For Love to be what it is, it must be subjected to 14 different types of test. An untested love is not real. Let me now show you how.

1. THE GIVING TEST: Are you in the relationship to seek your happiness or your mates happiness? A marriage made in heaven is between 2 givers. A marriage made in hell is between 2 takers. If your Love cannot give and let go, it's not true Love.

2. THE FORGIVENESS TEST: Offense must come. Your partner will hurt you. Loving without being hurt is like passing out waste without expecting your assistance to smell. But the issue is, Can the 2 of you settle any quarrel without introducing a 3rd party? Can you laugh again after you just faught? Can both of you forgive each other and move on? True Love will forgive no matter the offense.

3. THE TIME TEST: How does he/she behave when they are angry? What is their character like? These are things you can never know in a hurry. Time proves things. Never rush a relationship. Take it slow & watch things unfold. You need time to see who both of you really are. You can never know each other in a hurry.

4. THE ADMIRATION TEST: Do you admire each other enough or merely telorating each other? Is the person proud of you no matter what? No matter how silly you may look, you are somebody's hero. If it's genuine love, you will both admire each other.

5. THE EXCITMENT TEST: Can you both end time with each other without any form of intimacy? Do you feel excited about spending time together without touching, kising or romance? Are you in love with him/her as a person or simply in love with his or her container (breast, good shape, money)? Genuine love will always be excited to be with his or her partner in the absence of intimacy.

6. THE ACCEPTANCE TEST: Can you accept this person just the way they are without trying to change them? Can you love him/her along with their dirty habits? If your love always seeks to change each other, it is not genuine.

7. THE REVELATION TEST: When your partner is under pressure, does he/she take things calmly or is like a dynamite? (Don't make up your mind until you can study your partner under pressure. Pressure brings out the inner person and shows what is in the heart.) Hint: If there is no pressure create one and see how the person reacts.

8. THE COMPANIONSHIP TEST: Does he/she invest on spending time with you and enjoys doing so or they are just telorating your presence? True love does not telorate each other. It enjoys each other.

9. CONDITION TEST: This is Love without a reason. Can you care for each other no matter what the conditions; financial, physical health. Ask yourself will you still love him if he loses his high-paying job? Will you still love her if she gains 20 pounds? True Love can love and will still Love no matter what.

10. SECURITY TEST: This is basically trust. Can you trust this person when you are not together? Can you trust him when he is away on a business trip? Can you trust her when she is on a "Ladies night out"? Genuine Love can trust no matter what.

11. HONESTY TEST: Can you speak openly with each other? Can you tell your partner anything and not feel as though you\'re revealing too much? True love and telling the truth at all times is all about feeling good about yourself and your relationship – an open and trusting relationship.

12. COMPATIBILITY TEST: Do you and your partner have similar values about life and attitudes about your lifestyle? When thinking about this be sure to consider the importance of family, friends, children, work and sex. You can have independent INTERESTS, but your values should be very closely aligned. As the relationship progresses, this attribute of true love will become more and more apparent and important.

13. COMMUNICATION TEST: Communication is perhaps the number one component of true love. Can you share your deepest fears and dreams, and feel heard, understood and appreciated by your partner? Can the 2 of you resolve your problem without shouting or fighting or a 3rd part? Can you smoothly talk? Does he listen? Does she listen?

14. COMMITMENT TEST: Do you both have a strong desire to make the relationship last a lifetime and work despite disagreements, stresses and the everyday strains of life? There will be times when it may seem so much easier to just break up, but if it\'s true love both you and your partner will want to work hard to make it work. True love is always committed. Please share this post and drop your comment our Facebook Fanpage, De Love Guru Fanpage. Please do it now.

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16 SIGNS HE DOES NOT LOVE YOU...BY Andy Kwas. BB PIN 2326600E.

Welcome to the world's hottest "Love and Relationship Blog on the net. Here are 16 obvious signs that a guy does not love you and is not into you and can dump you at any moment and vanish like the wind. Let's talk.

1. HE ONLY CALLS AT "Booty Call" HOURS:  At 11pm, the booty call time zone begins. Anything that happens in a guy's life after 11pm is orientated to fulfilling the carnal need to copulate.  He does not love you. If a guy only calls you after 11:00pm upward, you are an after thought waiting to be used sexually and afterwards dumped. You are a mere sex partner and not a life partner.

2. HE INTRODUCES YOU AS A FRIEND TO OTHERS, especially to Ladies: Most guys would rather burst into flames and be condemned to hell than refer to a woman they Love as "a mere friend." If he refers to you as a mere friend when introducing you to others, something is wrong. He does not love you.

3. HE DOESN'T WANT TO BE SEEN WITH YOU IN PUBLIC. If a guy loves you, he will have no problem appearing with you in public, well lit, intoxication free situations where he may be required to introduce you to people he knows. If he avoids introducing you to people he knows, he is hoping to avoid the ridicule or damage that can occur as a result of association with you i.e he doesn't want people to think you are together. Does that sound like live to you?

4. HE WILL GIVE TO YOU: You can give without loving but you can't love without giving. If a man sincerely Loves You, he will give you. "For God SO LOVE The world that he GAVE".....Love will always let go just to make someone else happy. If he too stingy to give or sacrifice for you, He does not love you.

5. HE IS ALWAYS TOO BUSY FOR YOU: We “men” are rarely too busy for a woman we really care about. We are just doing something or seeing someone better. You will be surprised at the ability of a man's loins to manufacture free time if is truly in love with you.
 
6. HE TREATS YOU LIKE PART OF "The Crowd." If a guy is into you, he won’t treat you like a part of the crowd…JUST COMMON. He will refer to you, glance at you, tease you etc. He may ignore you for brief spells then refocus on you but if you feel like a piece of furniture in a group of people and you are getting no attention at all from a guy then he probably is not into you.

7. HE STOPS ANSWERING YOUR CALL: When a mate rarely calls and send sms or stops answering the phone when you call, no matter how many clever excuses he produces, look beyond the lies, you are an afterthought. He is is far from loving you.

8. QUALITY TIME: He refuses to spend quality time with you. If the bedroom is the only place you see your lover, it means your relationship is strictly sexual. If he is not joining you for dinner and a movie, drinking and dancing, family barbeques and/or concerts and sporting events, it means one of two things: Either you’re a secret lover, or your mate does not consider you worthy of his “fun time.” Does that sound like love to you?

9. YOU SUFFER ABUSE: Of course, if you’ve been hit by your mate, your relationship is in trouble. For women: If your man hits you (even once) he does not respect or love you. Maybe he thinks he does, but he doesn’t. Look at his life and the people in it. Can you think of a person that he would never hit? Would he hit his mother?

10. YOU ARE NOT A PRIORITY: In every relationship, you are either an option or a priority. If he truly loves you, he will make you an priority and not an option. He are 8 signs you are only an option

#1 They expect you to give, but they don’t give back.
#2 They constantly let you down even when you have the smallest of expectations from them.
#3 You’re just a backup plan in their life when they have nothing better to do.
#4 They don’t care about your feelings. Even when you emotionally pour your heart out, instead of understanding you or hearing you out, they just argue back or try to justify themselves.
#5 You feel hurt all the time when you’re around this person.
#6 They treat others in a special way and give them a lot of attention, but you’re never given any preference no matter how hard you try to please them.
#7 You’re always taken for granted no matter how much you try to win their affection.
#8 They are completely selfish and care only about themselves. They always put their own needs before yours, and they try to manipulate you all the time. [Read: How to stop thinking about someone you like a lot]

11. HE DOESN'T COME HOME or CAN'T BE REACHED AT NIGHT: No matter what the excuse, if you’re sleeping alone at night when you are not a widow and your mate always seems to have fun that lasts until daybreak, something is wrong. If your man’s not at home, won’t answer his phone, but later admits to be ”hanging out all night,” chances are, he’s spent the night with another woman. Judge for yourself, does that look like love to you?

12. HE IS NOT INTERESTED IN YOUR LIFE: If you never get to share your emotions, your thoughts on the day, your hobbies and interests with your mate, there is no love.  A person who loves you will listen to you talk about basket weaving for hours if that’s your passion. Not only that, but he will even help you weave the baskets! That’s what people who love each other do!

13. HE IS CONSTANTLY SEEING OTHER PEOPLE (either secretly or openly). If a person values, cherishes and appreciates you, they will do what it takes to keep you. This includes turning their back on all other prospects. If your man has told you that “they have to keep their options open,” or “after all, I’m still single,” or “I’m young…I can have friends…” that’s not love. Someone who loves you will ignore Randy and/or Mandy to make sure they keep their spot in your life. Don’t be angry that the person doesn’t choose to love you. It means you can do better!

14. HE DOESN'T HAVE YOUR BACK: Who do you call for help when you’re in trouble? Who helps you when you’re short on cash? If your significant one always denies your requests, there’s a problem. But if you’ve been dating Andy for 5 years and he hates to make you a sandwich, or rub your back, that’s not love. When you can’t get Andy to change your flat tire or loan you a twenty until payday, when you know for certain that he is capable, recognize that he is not in love.

15. HE DOESN'T TALK TO YOU: If you’re sitting quietly beside your mate, not saying a word, and this is a tradition in your relationship, someone’s not in love. People who love each other have great conversations that include humor, seriousness, emotion, action, stories, laughter and advice. If you struggle to make conversation with your mate, you can do better! Move on to someone who’s interested in you if you are single. But if you married, then work on your relationship.

16. HE IS “bored with” RELATIONSHIP: Some people don’t have the guts and nuts to end relationships. They will simply use you for as long as you stay around. Maybe they like the idea of having a mate; it makes them appear successful to certain others. When he says he is tired, believe it! Start taking steps to create a life without him. Coming next is "Signs she does not love you".

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THE TOP 10 CHEATING EXCUSES...by Andy Kwas. BB PIN 2326600E

Here are the top 10 cheating excuses I have heard partners give for cheating on their mates. If this describes you, then it's time to turn around. Let's Talk heart2heart.

1. THE FADING LOVE syndrome: I don't love you anymore and i know you don't love me anymore too.When you start feeling like you are no more in love, you are about to double cross your mate. Cheating is just a step ahead.

2. THE "IT'S MY PROBLEM"syndrome. It's not you, it's me. I have a weakness. I just cant stick with on partner alone. I love them serially. When you feel it's boredom to stick with just one partner, you are just a step away from cheating.

3. THE PRIVACY SEEKER syndrome: I need some space. I want to be alone. When you want to distance yourself from your mate even when he/she has been good and sweet, you are just a step away from cheating.

4. THE "I AM NOT GOOD ENOUGH FOR YOU"syndrome: You deserve better. Have you ever felt your mate is just managing you? Look ahead of you, you are just a step away from cheating.  

5. THE EX-FACTOR syndrome: Do you feel strongly attracted to your ex? Do you find it very difficult to hold your self back from the lure and pull of another opposite sex? Do you feel like experimenting? Have you seen yourself say to your mate, "We are just friends when it's obvious your relationship has gone beyond just friendship"? You are just a step away from cheating.

6. THE LACK OF CARE syndrome: Have you ever accused your mate of not caring, loving or listening to you? And have you found another person apart from your mate who does all these things and for whom you are beginning to have some soft spot? Watch it, you are not far from cheating.

7. THE LONELINESS syndrome: Do you feel very lonely? Do you often feel lonely even when you are in a relationship? Have you ever felt he or she doesn't want you anymore? Look beside you, cheating is calling your name.

8. THE SCATTER MY EGGS syndrome: Have you felt as though time is running out on you? Have you felt i have to get him to propose? Have you said to yourself," Its dangerous to put all my eggs in one basket. I have to date 3 or 4 girls/guys so that when one say's no, i can run with this or that person?" You are already cheating.

9. THE FANTASY syndrome: Have you found yourself fantasizing so strong about a particular person, a person of another race or color? Have you heard your self say, "What will it look like to sleep with this or that person"? You are already a cheater.....emotionally. JESUS called it VISUAL LUST...Meaning, "Guity".

10. THE TRIVIALIZERS syndrome: Have you felt like nothing is wrong with cheating? Have you felt it's okay to cheat on your mate? Have you heard yourself say, "What's the big deal in just sleeping with another person outside him/her? You are not far from cheating. Thanks for reading.

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19 BAD CHILDHOOD HABITS THAT MAY BE AFFECTING YOUR LIFE and RELATIONSHIPS NOW. By Andy Kwas. BB PIN 2326600E.

If life and your relationships has been rough and a bit difficult, then one of these childhood bad habit you acquired may still be affecting you right now. Go through each of these habits and find out the one that is still affecting you till date. Let's talk.

BAD Habit #1: ABANDONEMENT: These are People who cling to others because they're afraid of being left and don't feel important relationships will last. They're usually attracted to partners who cannot be there in a committed way. Their relationship suffer because they will do anything just to be in a relationship no matter what.

 BAD HABIT #2: SUBJUGATION: In relationships, these people let the other person have the upper hand and worry a lot about pleasing other people so they won't be rejected. Their relationship suffer because nobody likes a doormat. Such people are end up being used and dumped

BAD HABIT #3: UNRELENTING STANDARD: These people feel they must be the best in what they do and feel there is constant pressure to achieve and get things done. Their relationships suffer because they push themselves so hard.

 BAD HABIT #4:EMOTIONAL DEPRIVATION: Most of the time, these people haven't had someone to nurture them, to care deeply about everything that happens to them or someone who was tuned in to their true feelings and needs. Their relationship suffering because the moment they find someone who shows them a bit of Love and care, they end getting so attach and needy. Who likes such a person?

BAD HABIT #5:ENTITLEMENT: These are people hate to be constrained or kept from doing what they want or feel that they shouldn't have to follow the normal rules and conventions other people do. Their relationship suffer because they become very stubborn and can't submit to anyone when they get into a relationship.

 BAD HABIT #6: DEFECTIVENESS: These People think they're unworthy of the love, attention, and respect of others and believe that no matter how hard they try, they won't be able to get a significant partner to respect them or feel they are worthwhile. That's why their relationship suffer.

 BAD HABIT #7: MISTRUST/ABUSE: These people feel that they cannot let their guard down in the presence of other people, or else that person will intentionally hurt them. If someone acts nicely toward them, they assume that he/she must be after something. They don’t also trust anyone.

BAD HABIT #8: SELF SACRIFICE: These People put others' needs before their own, or else they feel guilty, and usually end up taking care of the people they're close to. Their relationship suffer because they get tired of giving too much with no love coming back to them.

BAD HABIT #9: SOCIAL ISOLATION: These people think they don't relate well to other people and/or feel that they don't fit in with any sort of group. They don't have friend and find it hard to get along with people. This is a bad habit.

 BAD HABIT #10: DEPENDENCE: These people often feel helpless or aren't capable of making a decision without the aid of another person. They are so dependent on others and that makes them stink.

 BAD HABIT #11: VULNERABILITY TO HARM: These people have a consistent fear that they will be involved in a catastrophe like an airplane crash, car accident, relationship breakdown, marriage failure, etc. Their fear always comes to pass.

 BAD HABIT #12: ENMESHMENT: These people have a weak sense of personal identity and habitually cling to or "mesh" with other people to do so in order to feel like a complete person.

 BAD HABIT #13: FAILURE: These people believe they will never succeed or that they're not as bright or talented as the people around them even in their relationships. Their constant expectation of failure is the reason why don’t succeed in their relationships.

 BAD HABIT #14: LACK OF SELF CONTROL: These people lack self-discipline and want to quit a task at the first sign of frustration or failure. They end up quitting many relationships and don’t even know why. Now you know.

BAD HABIT #15: SLACKERS: These people will give up personal satisfaction or fulfillment in order to avoid conflict or confrontation.  They will do everything to avoid conflict or run far from any form of confrontation making them suffer and bear so much pain in silence yet may never utter a word.

BAD HABIT #16: APPROVAL SEEKERS: These people place an extreme importance on other people's opinions and sometimes put a high level of significance on appearance and social status as a means to get attention. Being approved or admired is their greatest obsession. Approval seekers are sick and don't succeed in their relationships.

BAD HABIT #17: NEGATIVITY: These people have a way of focusing  on the worst parts of life (disappointments, missteps, and embarrassing moments) and might have inflated fears that they will make a mistake that will result in a personal crisis, like relationship ruin.

BAD HABIT #18: INHIBITION: These people are afraid to show emotion or, for that matter even initiate a conversation. They are so cold emotionally and find it very hard to express themselves when they are in a relationship.

 BAD HABIT #19: PUNITIVENESS: These people believe even the smallest mistake deserves punishment. Usually hold themselves—and others—to very high expectations; find it hard to empathize or forgive mistakes, their own and those of others.

Have I spoken to you through this post? Are you now wondering what to do if I touched your case? Now do this:
1. You may need to chat with me so I can help you resolve how yours started
2. You may choose to handle it yourself on your knees in God's presence.
3. If you have not given your life to Jesus Christ, start by doing that now. Say now, "Lord Jesus, I repent of my sins and I ask you to wash away my sins, come into my heart and be my lord and personal savior. I believe I am now saved, in Jesus name Amen! Now find a good church and become committed there.

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CONFESSIONS OF FORMER ABORTIONIST and THEIR SECRET ABORTION STORIES..By Andy Kwas. BB PIN 2326600E

INTRODUCTION: ABORTION HAS SECRET HIDDEN PAINS EVEN WHEN IT'S OVER.

Below are young teenage mothers and wife’s telling their Secret Abortion Stories and the Confessions from Former Abortionists. Hear from their own mouth now.

1) FORMER ABORTIONIST, ANTHONY M.D., says, "I want the general public to know that the doctors know that this baby is a person, this is a baby they are killing. That this is not some kind of blob of tissue . . ."

2) FORMER ABORTIONIST, DAVID M.D., says, "As a doctor, my heart got callous against the fact that I was a murderer, but that baby lying in a cold bowl educated me to what abortion really was. I have taken the lives of innocent babies and I have ripped them from their mother's wombs with a powerful vacuum machine. I hope God forgives me."

3) LORA: “Two weeks after the abortion, I went into labor. I staggered into the bathroom. And there, with my husband beside me, I delivered a part of my baby the doctor had missed. It was the head of my baby. . .” “I’ll wake up in the middle of the night, thinking I hear a baby crying. And I still have nightmares in which I am forced to watch my baby being ripped apart in front of me. I simply miss my baby. I constantly wake up wanting to nurse my child, wanting to hold my child. And that’s something the doctor never told me I would experience.”  

 4) NANA: “I was 18 when I got pregnant. At three months pregnant, I had an abortion. About seven years later… my heart broke. I was so overcome with grief. How could I have taken the life of my unborn child? I was told that I would be out in 8 minutes and I would feel only a little discomfort afterwards. They lied; it ruined 10 years of my life.” 

5) STEPHANIE: “I was deceived because I was not told the truth about what an abortion means to the life of an unborn baby. I was not told that at 10 weeks (which is when I had my abortion) my child was already fully formed. I was made to believe that I was doing something that was as natural as going to the dentist for a teeth cleaning.” 

6) HELEN: “The suction machine was turned on, causing tremendous pain. I was frightened, it hurt so much. I wanted to scream. I wanted it to stop. I am hurting but then I suddenly realized there was a baby inside that was hurting much more. They were killing my baby!” 

7) MARGARET: “If you abort your child, this child will haunt you the rest of your life because no other child can replace him. Your problems will multiply, not disappear. Talk to others who have had abortions, who have chosen not to abort, who have found other ways to give life instead of death to their children. Abortion is wrong. Even if you don’t believe that for sure, wouldn’t it be smarter to err on the side of life? Abortion is irreversible – once it’s done, you have no more options.” 

8) SONYA: Sonya had an abortion and advises other women “Don’t do it. Regret of a permanent decision is like watching a sad movie over and over again and hoping the ending will change – but it never will. As Whitney Houston sang in a song, “Don’t Throw Away Your Miracle!” 

Finally: If you have ever aborted or supported the abortion of a baby, then please hear this. A young man who died and came back to life had a visit to both heaven and hell. On his heavenly tour, he said, "I was taken to a large hall in heaven where I saw thousands of babies. Then I was told that these are the babies that were aborted on earth". I have news for you. If you ever make it to heaven someday, you will meet the baby whom you denied life. Hear a serious message Jesus finally gave him for us all: "Tell anyone that when they abort a baby or support the abortion of a baby, a part of their life is also cut short. Meaning they will NEVER live their full length of years on earth till they repent and confess their evil to JESUS and then what they lost will be restored back to them. Why not do this right now or talk to me via a private chat either on BB or whatsapp. I will be glad to attend to you. Jesus Loves You and he wants you saved. Thanks.

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HELP! I MARRIED MY LOVER and NOT MY FRIEND! UNDERSTANDING THE 12 DIFFERENCE BETWEEN A LOVER and A LOVER. By Andy Kwas. BB Pin 2326600E

INTRODUCTION: Statistics Have it that the Divorce Rate Of Lovers is about 89 percent while that of friends is 15 percent. Let me say it again, "Love is Not Enough To Sustain A Marriage Relationship". You need more than Love and One of the ingredient you need apart from Love is Cultivating Genuine Friendship with your Partner. Marry your Friend. Don't marry your Lover. A friend may be a Lover but a lover is not always a friend. I now present to you the 13 difference between a Lover and a friend.

1. Friends talk about Everything. Romantic Partners talk mainly about sex

2. Friends can connect in the midst of other friends. Lovers must be alone to connect

3. Friends laugh and play about almost everything. Lovers only laugh and play when its connected with sex

4. Friends relate unconditionally. Lovers relate conditionally. For Lovers, No gain, no relationship.

5. When friends are together, their companion is never boring cos they never run out of what to say. If you always run out of what to say when you are with your wife or partner, you are lovers.

6. Friends connect at all levels (spirit, soul and body). Lovers don't. They only connect sexually (body).

7. Friends are never tired of being with each other. Lovers get tired once they have sorted out what they came together to achieve...Sex!

8. For couples who are friends, they have bonds with themselves apart from the kids and that's principally communication. For Lovers, what binds them is either sex pleasure moments or the responsibility of bringing up the kids. Apart from these 2, they bore themselves.

9. Friends don't keep secrets. Lovers keep secret. If you are very secretive and not being real with your partner, you married a Lover

10. Friends are themselves when they are together. If you find yourself not being true to your real self, always hiding and covering up your tracks, you are with a Lover.

11. When friends are together, they are themselves. No pretence, no walking on egg shells. If you have to always watch what you say and thread carefully in a relationship so you don't offend your partner, you are married or dating a Lover.

12. If you feel like you and your partners are strangers and do not really know yourselves, you are with a Lover. Friends are just opposite. They don't just know themselves. They are fond of each other.

13. If you find it as a struggle in Opening up to your partner on ALL Issues that concern you both, You are Lovers. How come there is someone else apart from your partner you can tell EVERYTHING? Hmmm! Thanks for Reading and let us know if you have more points on this issue.

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HOW TO MAKE HIM FALL IN LOVE WITH YOU EFFORTLESSLY..By Andy Kwas. BB PIN 2326600E.

INTRODUCTION: Let me start with a question for you. Does he like you? In order to really fall in love, you actually have to like each other first. If you’re reading this and you’re just asking yourself, “How do I know if he’s into me? Well, I guess I will have to write another article for you all to read next time on that subject! So let’s assume that he likes you and you like him. You may know how to attract a guy’s attention, but do you know how to make him want to go out with you? Find out how to make a man fall in love with you using these simple steps.


1. Be confident: You have to believe in yourself. Many women remain single because of their low self-esteem. I once met a girl that wasn't that pretty, but she claimed that she could have any man she wanted. She told me, “It doesn't matter how you look, it matters what you think of yourself.” Later that night I met her boyfriend. They were on a long-term relationship and they seemed to be happy together. This woman was acting like she was wearing an invisible crown; and it was working.

2. Do not overreact: When you like someone and you want to make him like you too, it's very easy to make a fool of yourself. Don't be too loud or too invisible; don't laugh for no reason, don't say anything that pops into your head. That usually happens when you are too nervous about what he'll think of you – there is no reason to be so stressed. Just relax, take a big breath and act like he is one of your friends.

3. Be yourself: The first rule to make him fall in love with you is to be yourself. If he will love you for something, let that be your special character and your real self. Don't pretend to be someone you are not. Don't do anything that isn't you. After all, you do have enough self respect to be loved for what you really are, don't you?

4. Be friendly – Smile and compliment him. The first step to make a guy like you is to get close to him. Who can resist the company of a friendly and happy face?

5. Find out about him: To get into his heart, you have to get into his mind first. Find out what he's made of. Ask people that know him to discover what he likes and dislikes but be discreet about it. Do you have something in common? Maybe you listen to the same music, or you both like to play chess. Take advantage of the information you've got. Challenge him in to a game of chess or start a conversation about the bands you both enjoy.

6. Get to know his friends: To win his heart, try to win his friends first. For men, friendship is very important. Take it for granted that he trusts his friends' opinions, and he faithfully follows their advice. If there is someone that can influence him, it will be his friends. So, the sooner you get to know them and the more they like you, the more possible it is to be with him!

7. Maintain your independence: Don’t be too needy and act like he is your God. Must you always ask him for everything? Chapter what verse what? Men don't like women who line up before them like streams of beggars waiting to be helped. Find a way to be creative enough to be independent. This is why men generally likes working class ladies. Don't tell them I told you please....Lolzzz.

8. Make him feel important. While no man wants you to appear needy or desperate, no man wants to feel that he doesn't matter at all. When you are with him, turn off your cell phone. Be on time for dates. Return his calls within a reasonable amount of time. Following a few simple courtesies will allow you to express his importance in your life.

9. Be intriguing. He would not have asked you out in the first place if he didn't find you fascinating. Yet a woman’s instinct is often to share too much too soon. It 's normal to want to bring a new love into your confidence. However, if the relationship becomes long term, you will have the rest of your life to deal with the not-so-sexy realities of life. In the beginning, maintain a certain aura of mystery by not telling him every little thing about you and your daily life. Don't lie, of course, but don't give in to the urge to bare your soul about anything and everything.

10. Dress attractively. Dressing attractively doesn't mean dress provocatively. Men are visual, and women know this better than anything else. When you’re out with the man you like, look good.

11. Be pleasant. Stop frowning your face and stop saying, "I can't smile". Don’t you know that men can’t resist a cute smile? And if you can be pleasant and warm when you’re with him, he’ll love you for it.

12. Don’t be rude: Men are completely put off by rude or arrogant women. If you can be rude to your date or even a waiter, he wouldn’t be able to help but wonder if it’s only the tip of the rude iceberg. Men definitely love a woman who can take a stand, but if it’s in the form of arrogance, he’d stay a mile away from falling in love.

13. Connect with him intellectually: On your dates together, try and connect with him intellectually now and then. Speak to him about his career goals, his ambitions and aspirations, and let him see that he can actually have a meaningful life-altering conversation with you.

14. Work your eye contact: It’s been seen that romantic eye contact can actually make two people fall in love with each other in no time. The next time you’re having a conversation with him, stare deeply into his eyes as he talks to you. You can smile or flirt, but every time your eyes meet, let the eye contact linger even if both of you aren’t exchanging words. It makes the guy feel warm and fuzzy, and would definitely stir his heart.

15. Don’t be easily available: This is tricky, but it’s definitely a great way to make a man fall in love with you. Make him miss you and one way to do this is being scarce from time to time. Give him reasons why he can't always have you when he want. Water is far more important diamond but how come diamond is far more expensive than water? The answer is availability. The ready availability of water though more important have reduced its price and it will also reduce yours till you learn how not to be too available even when your body cries to be with him.

16. Don’t let him know you’ve fallen for him: Don't be too excited showing your 32 when you are with a guy you like. No matter how much you like a guy. Never let him know that you’ve fallen head over heels for him. Always make him wonder about how serious you are, and let him be the first one to make the move into a serious relationship.

17. Play hard to get, but not too hard! A guy likes a bit of a challenge. There’s something about overcoming an obstacle that makes the victory so much sweeter. If you’re easy to get, a guy could lose interest. Same if you are too hard to get. Find a balance where you can show him hat you’re interested, but make him work a little bit for it.The longer the chase, the more he would want you.

18. Be Friends. There is a special connection between good friends. A level of comfort, honesty, openness, acceptance, understanding and so on. This is always a good foundation for a good, long-lasting relationship. This doesn’t mean that you have to be friends before dating, you can definitely grow that friendship while you are dating. Friendship is something that can often come naturally, but you do need to work on it and give it an environment where it can grow.

19. Be love-able. If you want him to love you, be love-able. Don’t be mean, dramatic and self-centered, be love-able. Love him and show him love. Love is a verb, not a feeling. Love is something you do. Show him you love him by doing the little things. If you’re not sure what to do, check out the 5 Love Languages. You might find it helpful to learn how to express love in different ways.

Share this post and don't forget to also read "How to make a woman fall in love with you effortlessly". Recommend my BB PIN 2326600E to someone so they can get my daily love post. Drop your comments below now or on my Facebook Fanpage so we can chat. Click on the facebook button up right now. I will be there waiting for you. Connect with me on Twitter @AndyQwas. Just click on the twitter button now. My name is Andy Kwas & I am De Love Guru.

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HOW TO WOO A GIRL EFFORTLESSLY AND MAKE HER FALL FOR YOU IN 18 SIMPLE STEPS...By Andy Kwas. BB PIN 2326600E

INTRODUCTION: Wooing a girl is an art. Too many guys rush right in, express their undying infatuation to a girl they like and expect everything to work out just fine. It doesn’t work that way. It’s all about warming her up, letting her know your intentions, and waiting for her to reciprocate your intentions. Just follow these 18 steps, and you’ll definitely be well on your way to wooing a girl the right way and getting her attention.

1. Be confident. Women love confidence. A confident man tells her that he is in charge of his world and capable of taking care of her.

2. Listen To Her. Women appreciate a good listener. Stare into her eyes and listen, really listen, to the things she says. Remember women love to talk and if you can lend her that listening ears, she will fall for you.

3. Be attentive. Women like attention from their man. They do not like being around someone who demands it. Be attentive to her needs and moods. That will also tell her you are sensitive towards her. Remember, women build their world around their relationship while men build their world around their work.

4. Show your soft spot. Men who show their vulnerable side are attractive to women. But do not be needy. It is important to be in control; otherwise, you may scare her off.

5. Romance her. Romance is not sex and sex is not romance. Romance is simply masculinity putting on feminity. It's that simple. Women love romance and anything romantic. Flowers, red wine, chocolates, candle-lit dinners, and gifts will do the trick. Call her up just to tell her you’re thinking about her and can’t wait to see her again. Be attentive and make her feel cherished and truly special.

6. Express yourself. Expressions of your love are what most women crave. Love notes, love poems, and love quotes go a long way. Don't sit down there looking like a moron not knowing what to say. Open your mouth and express yourself genuinely.  Remember women fall in love through their ears while men fall in love through their eyes.

7. Compliment her. A compliment has more effect when it is sincere, well timed and often, out of the blue. A compliment is valued when there is a surprise element to it. Telling her how witty you find her, how her intelligence turns you on, appreciating how thoughtful and generous she can be, or her gentle nature, all these are deeper compliments, which, when paid sincerely, make the recipient feel ten feet tall.

8. Adapt your style. Find out what she likes in men’s fashion and if it suits your style, incorporate some of these things. For instance, you could change the way you wear casuals or a specific cologne to suit her. This your old fashion thing is not working sir! Adapt your style.

9. Leave Memory Of you: Do something that reminds her of you when you are gone. Always look for ways to constantly remind her of you but don't do it in a sexual way. That's weak and sinful. You can start by buying her something inexpensive that reminds her of you when she is away from you.

10. Open up to her. Here’s something you need to know about the art of communication. If you want to connect emotionally with anyone in the whole world, all you need to do is confess about an incident from your own life. When you confess about something, it reveals your vulnerable side, and it makes the other person open up to you without even realizing it. The more you open up to a girl and talk to her about your problems, the more she’ll open up to you and get emotionally attached to you.

11. Display maturity: No woman loves a man-child. Grow up and stop acting like a child. Show her how responsible you are about finances, or serious you are about your career. And demonstrate your ability to think clearly and rationally when disagreements crop up or a conflict of interests presents itself and stop acting like a child she has to mummy all over again.

12. Talk to her about herself: Women love it when a guy takes interest in their likes, dislikes, interests, family, childhood and so many other areas. Talking to her about herself is the best way to make her fall in love. Don't go to a woman and saturate your chat with her by telling her how great and wonderful you are. Take the focus from you and fix it on her. She will love you for it.

 13. Be Faithful: Don’t ever give her occasion to doubt you. Let her know that you have eyes only for her and the rest of the world takes a backseat. Let her sense your commitment to her and your relationship. So many people profess deep feelings and then cheat on their partners. Women need to feel secure and once that is established, it takes the relationship to a higher level.

14. Time spent with her is precious: Make it clear that you really treasure the time you spend with her, irrespective of your busy schedule. For instance, if she suddenly tells you she’d like to meet you because she’s finishing work early and you had something else lined up, cancel it for her. If she begs you to come see a movie and you had plans with your buddies, do it for her and let her know subtly that you did. She will surely reward you!

15. Learn what turns her on: Every one has what turns them on. For a woman, there are 5 basic things that turn them on and guys too have 5. Not being able to decode what turns a woman on is like having a car and not knowing what your car needs to be on the road. (Read: The 5 Love Language and How to apply them).

16. Give her space: Don’t be possessive and make her account to you regarding her whereabouts. Let her know you trust her. Don’t expect her to spend all her free time with you. Let her have her own life too. Don’t alienate her from her friends and don’t police her around. Let her be her own person and please trust her.

17. Be Thoughtful: You remember little things she told you, and remind her of it at opportune moments. It may be that she once mentioned she loves having chicken soup when she’s got a cold, and you land up with some when she’s got the sniffles. Or she’s told you how she adores a particular entrée at a popular restaurant and the next time you go there, you order it and surprise her. It makes her feel like you genuinely listen to her and take the trouble to act on it and make her happy.

18. Be yourself: The last point on how to make her fall in love with you is to be yourself. Don't pretend to be someone you are not. Don't do anything that isn't you. It won't be long before she finds out that you are fake. Thanks for reading and don't forget to also read "How to make a man fall in love with you effortlessly".

Share this post and Recommend my BB PIN 2326600E to someone so they can get my daily love post. Drop your comments below now or on my Facebook Fanpage so we can chat. Click on the facebook button up right now. I will be there waiting for you. Connect with me on Twitter @AndyQwas. Just click on the twitter button now. My name is Andy Kwas & I am De Love Guru.

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THE GUIDING MAP ON HOW TO MAKE RELATIONSHIP LAST AND SUCCESSFUL...By Andy Kwas. BB PIN 2326600E.

Getting married or Starting a new relationship is like embarking on a journey to an unknown destination. Imagine the frustration, the pain, the confusion and the hazards you will go through without a guiding map. If your marriage or relationship has been tough and frustrating, it's either you never had a map to guide you or you presumptuously jumped in thinking you could navigate your way through. Having studied relationships and what makes them work, I now offer you what I call, "The Love Guru Guiding map on how to make relationships last and successful. Let's talk.

1. ANNIVERSARIES
Always celebrate! Whether it’s the 1st or the 50th, each year together is a triumph.

2. APPRECIATION
Let each other know how much you appreciate one another.

3. BE BEST OF FRIENDS
 Be best of friends preferably before being intimate lovers.
Take time to know each other so the relationship will be a deep one. Tell each other about your crushes, dreams and problems. Make sure he/she is your best friend before getting engaged.
The strong bond of friendship will help you both survive tough times.

4. BOND
Make it a point to spend time together often but leave room for each other. Also spend time alone with each other, so that at the end of the day you could both share your experiences. This way, you stay interesting with your partner.

5. CHANGING EACH OTHER
Don’t marry to change each other your partner. If you can't accept each other the way you are, then don't bother to be in a relationship. You’ll never change each other.

6. START WITH JESUS CHRIST
Marriage was His idea and not yours. He did not create the marriage institution and left out the manual on how to run it. Why not settle down and make up up your mind to follow the operational manual, the BIBLE.

7. COMPLIMENTS
Always compliment each other.
This will prevent feelings of resentment & thinking that one is being taken for granted.

8. DATE
Keep doings things that you both enjoy and do them together.
Make time & continue to date to keep the romance – look good, smell good to maintain physical attraction.

9. DIFFERENCES
Celebrate differences. Never force your ideologies down each other’s throat. Give up trying to turn your partner into you. Accept differences, appreciate them.

10. FIGHTS
Fight with the aim to resolve the issue. Don’t outdo each other.
The longer you extend the fight. The more chances that you’ll say something hurtful that you don’t really mean. As mad as you were with your partner, he/she is still the person who laughs at your jokes & thinks you’re hot. Hear each other out, don’t dig up old issues. Choose your battles.
Make sure the fight will be worth it & that something will change in the relationship as a result of the fight.

11. FLAWS
Know that the perfect person does not exist.
Know that just as there are things that you love about him/her, there will be things that will make you go crazy. We are only human with our own flaws.

12. FUN
Have fun together! This means keeping the fun & spontaneity that was there in the early days. Allow yourselves to get silly – shower together, pee with the door open (What?!) etc.
Being able to make each other laugh & see the lighter, crazier, absurd side is the best way to get through all the differences in personalities, adjustments in lifestyle & opposing viewpoints.

13. GOALS
Make sure you have similar goals.
It would be difficult to keep your bond intact if your views are complete opposite.

14. GRUDGES
Quit tabulating grudges. Let it go. Discuss it, then trash it, don’t recycle it.

15. KEEPING IT HOT
Keep it hot by traveling to different places together.
A new setting will do wonders. Always have skin contact – be it holding hands, a massage or just plain leg rubbing.

16. HONESTY
Don’t lie or hide things. The problem will only get bigger.

17. KNOW EACH OTHER
Learn each other’s interest. It really keeps the conversation flowing!

18. HUG
A hug can be far better more intimate than a kiss.

19. IDENTITY
Don’t lose your personality – that’s why he/she fell in love with you. Have separate interest & activities to keep your individuality & to be able to contribute more to the relationship.

19. INDEPENDENCE
Having your own income means you’re the boss in your life.

20. IN-LAWS
Make rooms for the in-laws.

21. INTENTIONS
Wish each other well. Don’t wish each other worst.

22. ISSUES
Speak up about the awkward stuff now, like money & sex. The earlier, the better.

23. LISTEN
Listen, listen, listen. Hear each other out especially during arguments.

24. LOOK GOOD
Mind your appearance! Stay fit & healthy for each other.

25. LOVE
It all boils down to your love, chemistry & respect for each other.

26. MEMORIES
Remind each other of the old days. Do something that you used to do for each other before.
It may even be corny but it made you two together. Experience new things together- from dining into a new restaurant to experiencing street food together to exploring to new places. It’s the little surprises that make great memories.

27. MIND READING
No matter how long you’ve been together, do not think that you can read each other’s mind.

28. NEEDS
Be good to yourself, then be good to your partner. That’s what love is all about. Think about your partner. Will it make him/her happy? Will she/he enjoy it? Consider each other’s feelings.
Be very attentive & sensitive to each other’s needs, physically & emotionally, that way your partner learns to do the same for you. Never take your partner for granted.

29. PRIORITIES
If one says it’s important, then it is! Prioritize each other among other things!

30. SPACE
Give each other space. Have dates with your girlfriends, have your boy’s night out.
If you can’t trust each other with this, then don’t get married.

31. SORRY
Say sorry when you’re wrong.

32. SURPRISES
No matter how long you’ve known each other, be open to surprises, both good or bad.

33. TEAMWORK
Think for two & always work as a team.
Consult each other before making a decision because everything will always affect both of you.
Strengthen couple power. In many ways, we have to decide based on what is best for the relationship in favour of our individual selves.

34. SUPPORT
Support each other’s dream. Be willing to follow your passions,
support your partner in his/her decisions & create new ones together. Two heads are better than one.

35. TALK
Tell each other’s stories. Life goes by so fast & its easy to see how easily couple can grow apart.
Whenever something funny, scary, exciting or juicy happened to you or to someone you know, tell each other about it & have your partner do the same. Keep each other in the loop of life, even by email if you have to. Thanks for reading.

If you desire to comment on this, please do it on my Facebook Fanpage so we can all interact. Just go to my home Page on this blog and click the facebook button. It will lead you straight to my Fanpage where you can drop your comments and ask me your questions. I am De Love Guru. Share my BB PIN 2326600E to your friends so they can get my daily love post. Follow me on twitter by also clicking the twitter button on my home Page. God bless you.

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16 TYPES OF GUYS THAT WON'T COMMIT AND WHY...By Andy Kwas. BB PIN 2326600E

Let me help someone resolve a question countless number of woman ask me almost everyday. The question is, "why won't he commit?" To answer this question, let me now show you 16 Types of men that will be tough to get into the commitment fold. Hopefully, you can spot one of these type of men early in the relationship so you can move on to the guy who is ready to commit.

1. THE NARCCIST: Beware of the guy who talks about himself too much, looks too perfect and works on building his image superficially. He won't commit to you because he's too committed to himself.

2. THE SCHOOL BOY: A boy is a boy and won't commit soon. The reason is, he is a boy and is yet to grow up. A senseless girl in her mid twenties once said to me in a chat, "I know he is just 23 and in his first year in the University but I will wait for him". Ladies listen: It takes a certain amount of maturity to get to the point of commitment, so don't hold your breath if you're dating a guy afflicted with chronic immaturity.

3. THE UNORGANIZED STUD. This guy lacks the ability to plan and is very disorganized. He's constantly trying to make ends meet, and always feeling like there's so much he has to do before he can commit. In his mind there's a bright tunnel ahead of him, the only problem is that it's a long, long road to that tunnel. As far as "unorganized stud" is concern, there is no time for love until he is settled though that which he seeks may take him years to accomplish.

4. THE COMFORT SEEKER: Many men will not commit until they are financially comfortable. To them, commitment means dates, gifts, a ring and eventually the altar. When it comes to finances, guys are super-careful and practical. Some guys are so practical that money issues can trump love if everything doesn't line up right.

5. THE CELEBRITY: These are the pro athletes, rock stars and great celebrities of the world. It's great to land one of these guys, but you're probably nervous the whole time that he'll stray. When a guy can hook up with basically any girl he wants, he probably won't commit. And, if he does, it's a risky commitment.

6. THE DOG. This man is simply a dog looking for anything in skirt to pounce on.
Many men are out for sex...as much sex as they can get. Committing to one woman pretty much ruins this objective. And if a dog commits to a woman, sometimes she can't keep up with his voracious sexual appetite, so he'll be gone.

7. THE WORKAHOLIC MAN: Workaholic men put in the long hours and have no time to think of a woman, let alone commit. They'd rather be in the office, problem solving and making tons of cash.

8. THE BAGGAGE CARRIER: This man will keep swearing off new relationships because of past pain and anguish caused by a rejection or intense breakup in his past. He says to himself, "If I don't commit, I don't open myself up to getting hurt again, right"? He's had very bad experiences with past friend especially the female folks or he's a child of divorce. Unresolved pain in his past can prevent him from committing.

9. THE PLAYER: Once a guy commits, he will lose the right to date other women. Most guys try to hold on to this right as long as they can, especially when they are not sure what they are looking for. I have a friend who is rich, in his forties and yet won't commit to any woman.

10. DOUBLE VISION MAN: Simply put, this guy has someone else. It's hard for a guy to commit to one woman if he's got more than one woman on his mind. Imagine trying to commit if you had a couple of guys on your mind.

11. THE WEIGHT LIFTER: In life, it's tough to balance love, family, work, etc. If there are things in his life that demand more attention than his love life, he'll commit to the other stuff and deal with love when he can.

12. MR. FEARFUL. He's Afraid It Won't Work Out. Committing involves risk to him. You are essentially taking a plunge, and investing energy in the relationship. Some people feel that it's not worth a try unless it's 100% certain it will work out. But, you can never really be that sure of things, and that unknown keeps Mr. Fearful from committing.

13. MR. COLD FEET. None of His Friends Have Committed. If you are able to get the first guy of his group of friends to commit, I commend you. Most of guys want to commit eventually, but they don't want to be the first one, and there is respect among guys for the last single guy in the group.

14.  THE SEX HUNTER: Sadly, some guys are just out to conquer women. Keep a close eye on things so you're not a victim of conquesting.  Beware of a sex hunter.

15. THE FUN SEEKER: He's Not into You Enough to Commit. He may be seeing you as a fun person to date, but may never have thought of you as someone he had call a wife. See what a guy said to me about a woman he had dated for 5 years, "Yes she's such a nice friend but I don't see her as the mother of my kids". And he pointed at someone else. It's tough to swallow when this is the situation.

16. THE ESCAPIST:  You're Pressuring Him Too Much to Commit so he's on the run. If he's going to commit, let him come to that moment on his own. If you continue to bring it up, he may become bitter, disturbed, annoyed and may escape. Let him come to the decision to commit naturally on his own, and not because he was pressured to do so.

Now you know the 15 Types of men that won't commit and why. One of the biggest factors in the success of a relationship is timing. Read up my next post on "How to get him to commit and Thank you for it". Follow me on Twitter: twitter.com/AndyQwas and recommend my BB PIN 2326600E to someone. Now drop your comment below now. I am De Love Guru.

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